Because I’m a Senior

Letting go of every single dream
I lay each one down at Your feet
Every moment of my wandering
Never changes what You see

I’ve tried to win this war I confess
My hands are weary I need Your rest
Mighty Warrior, King of the fight
No matter what I face, You’re by my side

When You don’t move the mountains I’m needing You to move
When You don’t part the waters I wish I could walk through
When You don’t give the answers as I cry out to You
I will trust, I will trust, I will trust in You!

Truth is, You know what tomorrow brings
There’s not a day ahead You have not seen
So, in all things be my life and breath
I want what You want Lord and nothing less

When You don’t move the mountains I’m needing You to move
When You don’t part the waters I wish I could walk through
When You don’t give the answers as I cry out to You
I will trust, I will trust, I will trust in You!

You are my strength and comfort
You are my steady hand
You are my firm foundation; the rock on which I stand

Your ways are always higher
Your plans are always good
There’s not a place where I’ll go, You’ve not already stood

This last month of my life, I’ve really been taking this song to heart. God may not have been moving in ways I had thought He would, but I’ve been really trying to just trust in Him. Recently, God’s been responding in ways that have blown me away. To go from this summer where I could barely train, end up at preseason and actually compete and then feel overlooked and like I hadn’t been given a real opportunity, to now be at a place where I’ve been given a shot and am starting in tonight’s game. That’s a journey only God could’ve planned.

I think most people would define success as competing on a team with a winning record and being in the S11 with accolades. As senior night approaches (just one week away), I can’t help but look back on my college career and think how it completely defys the world’s version of success but in my mind, I wouldn’t have changed anything.

I decided rather late that I wanted to play soccer in college. By that time, I was a little behind the game. Playing with the IWUWS team after trying out with a few other colleges, I knew there was something different about this program. I had never previously been on a team that prayed after each practice and genuinely interacted like a family would interact. Unlike most of my fellow classmen, I had to really pursue Coach Bratcher and almost beg him to let me be apart of the 2012 class. Coming in that first preseason, I knew I was forever going to be changed. I knew after just a couple weeks that I had met life-long friends.

While I’ve had a mediocre career – getting the opportunity to start at least once every season and typically being one of the first players off the bench, I’ve found most of my success and joy off the field. In the four years that I’ve been here, I’ve made countless memories and I can’t imagine my college career without IWUWS. It’s definitely had it’s low parts, and there have been many times where I questioned what I was doing, but I’m so glad I had the opportunity to be a part of IWUWS.

My freshman year, I had the opportunity to be molded under an incredible senior class. They led in a way that really revealed Christ. It’s been that class (Kylie, Becca, Jamie, Kelsey, and Erica) who really shaped my class to be the leaders we have been this senior season. Fast forward to my sophomore year, we were all scared to think of soccer without the seniors. Sophomore year was rough. Coach Carr, who was incredibly influential in all of our lives wouldn’t be coming back, and we would be getting a new coach the next year. The search for a new coach was honestly so challenging and it really divided our team. I remember our class really struggled and there was a lot of hurt and just lost trust between a lot of us. On top of all that, I tore my ACL.

Tearing my ACL was one of the most influential parts of my life. It taught me to truly value soccer and just mobility and being able to be active. I gained a whole new perspective on myself and servanthood. That year/summer was the hardest I’ve ever worked, and by the grace of God, I was “ready to go” for my Junior year of soccer. Coming in with a whole new coaching staff on top of just being back from ACL recovery, I cried every single day of preseason! Coach was tough, but it was that toughness that our team needed. Although it was one of the hardest things I’ve ever been pushed through, my junior year of soccer was a really growing year. It pushed me outside of my comfort zone, and although our record didn’t show it, Coach Strader really began to transform our team. I suffered from compartment syndrome throughout that whole season, and had to sit out of almost all of the spring season. After my 2nd surgery, I thought I would be done, but God wasn’t done teaching me.

Coming into my senior year, I believe God really wanted to mold me into a servant-leader. I think he wanted me to learn to humble myself completely and trust Him. Throughout these 4 years, my class has been through it all. We’ve suffered from injuries, sucky records, heart-break losses, and completely new coaching staffs. We’ve really come into our own this season, and I couldn’t be more proud of each and every one of my fellow seniors. This year is deifnitely the tightest knit group of girls I’ve ever had the privilige to play with, and I’m so grateful for the opportunity! Coach Strader has really poured into all of us and brought our whole team farther than we thought we could go. Although this has been a challenging season personally, it’s been a great season collectively, and we aren’t done yet!

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