couple nights ago, i was driving around Marion after dark. Honestly, I dislike being behind the wheel and driving at night. I find it incredibly difficult to see what’s out ahead of me. I feel like I can only see 10 yards ahead, and that scares me and frustrates me. As I was thinking about that, I couldn’t help but think about my life and how life is similar to driving at night. So often, we want to see far ahead. We wish God could just give us a glimpse of the road ahead. It’s hard to take life day by day. It’s hard to plan out our lives without knowing where we are going or how we’ll arrive at our end goals. It’s frustrating to be in a valley and wonder how far we’ll have to travel down the road to reach the mountain top.
What I’m starting to find is that everytime I plan out my life, my year, my month, my week, my day, my next hour, it doesn’t seem to go as I planned. I’m learning to let go and let God. Exodus 14:14 says, “The Lord will fight for you, you need only to be still.”How cool is that. If we just rest in God’s plan, he will fight for us. Yet so often, we don’t. We want to fight for ourselves. We think we can do it on our own. And it’s at those times, when we are fighting our own battles, when we are planning out our lives that worry begins to creep in. It’s at those times that stress creeps in.
And I wonder to myself why I’m so stressed, I wonder why I can’t seem to plan out my life. I wonder why God won’t show me the future. I wonder if things will ever be “normal” again. I wonder if I’m going to come into preseason ready to go like the rest of my team. I wonder if my left knee will ever feel like my right knee again. I wonder when I’ll stop having pain. I wonder when I’ll be able to run again. I wonder when my friends will finally be given a break. I wonder where God is in the midst of the valleys. I make up things to worry about, and then I start worrying that I’m worrying too much. I lose sight of the fact that I need to just be still and let God fight for me. I forget that my life is in the hands of the God of the universe. And when I really think about it, I would much rather my life be in God’s hands than in my hands. I’d rather God was planning out my life instead of me planning out my life. I’m a planner at heart, but if anything, I’m learning that life is uncertain. Things can be taken away from you in a heartbeat. One day, you can be playing the game you love, and then next day, it’s been over 4 months since you’ve touched a soccer ball or gone for a hard run. So I’m learning to let go and let God. I’m learning to be still and let God fight. I’m learning to put the work in on my part and expect God to do his part. I’m learning the power of prayer and the comfort in prayer. So although it’s frustrating to only see a few yards ahead, it’s also exciting to rely on God and watch his plan for us unfold. In the end, his plan will prevail anyways, so my advice? Pray, work hard, and let the Lord fight for you.